This week I'm asking you to tell me what works. You see, I'm flying to New York early Thursday morning, and I'm scared out of my wits. I don't know why I have such an unnecessary fear of flying. I know all of the statistics - you know the ones - flying is safer than driving, the pilots are smart people, blah, blah, blah.
It doesn't seem to help me a whole lot. By nature, I worry - alot. I have flown a few times before, and it was totally no big deal. I don't know if it's because of 9/11 or because I have kids now or what. But I could really use some advice.
Here's what I have planned so far. First of all, I am fully aware that God is in control of everything. I really do. I guess my human brain still thinks I should be in control of something. Second, Jason has given me some good, common sense suggestions. For instance, he reminded me that if the flight attendants are not looking worried, then chances are everything is fine. That being said, he did not mention what exactly to do if they do look worried. Third, I am buying a nice-sized box of Dramamine. Hey - it knocks me out a little and it does help with motion issues. Oh, and it's pretty much the only knock-out drug that's safe to take when you're pregnant.
That's about all I've got. This trip (I'll post about it later) is an awesome opportunity that only comes along every once in a very great while. You see, my fabulous husband gave me this trip for Christmas. Four whole days with my childless sister in Albany, including one full day in NYC. There will be lunch outings, lots of shopping, movie watching with Rotel dip, and a fabulous trip to the spa. Sleeping in, sleeping in quiet, well hey - just sleeping. I absolutely do not want to spend two of my four days in panic mode, you know?
Ok, spill your secrets. What helps you or the people you know? I know there are tons of people out there who really don't like to fly. Oh, and please do not tell me stories like "My brother flew and the plane crashed, and he survived!". These stories are not what I mean when I say "help". Thanks! Oh - and I leave super early Thursday morning, so comment soon!
It doesn't seem to help me a whole lot. By nature, I worry - alot. I have flown a few times before, and it was totally no big deal. I don't know if it's because of 9/11 or because I have kids now or what. But I could really use some advice.
Here's what I have planned so far. First of all, I am fully aware that God is in control of everything. I really do. I guess my human brain still thinks I should be in control of something. Second, Jason has given me some good, common sense suggestions. For instance, he reminded me that if the flight attendants are not looking worried, then chances are everything is fine. That being said, he did not mention what exactly to do if they do look worried. Third, I am buying a nice-sized box of Dramamine. Hey - it knocks me out a little and it does help with motion issues. Oh, and it's pretty much the only knock-out drug that's safe to take when you're pregnant.
That's about all I've got. This trip (I'll post about it later) is an awesome opportunity that only comes along every once in a very great while. You see, my fabulous husband gave me this trip for Christmas. Four whole days with my childless sister in Albany, including one full day in NYC. There will be lunch outings, lots of shopping, movie watching with Rotel dip, and a fabulous trip to the spa. Sleeping in, sleeping in quiet, well hey - just sleeping. I absolutely do not want to spend two of my four days in panic mode, you know?
Ok, spill your secrets. What helps you or the people you know? I know there are tons of people out there who really don't like to fly. Oh, and please do not tell me stories like "My brother flew and the plane crashed, and he survived!". These stories are not what I mean when I say "help". Thanks! Oh - and I leave super early Thursday morning, so comment soon!
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13 comments:
I haven't flown recently but have been in other stressful situations (root canal) where I had to talk myself down.
You have to busy your mind so that it doesn't wander into unwanted thoughts. Doing something repetitive, like saying the rosary may help (but that may freak out other passengers if they see it in your hands).
I had to focus my mind on something other that what was happening and what could go wrong. While getting the root canal I repeated Thank You God in my head and also counted how many times I said it (don't remember now) but it kept me calm and I didn't freak out.
And I am not even religious - you just have to busy the brain :)
There is a supplement called Inositol that is so helpful for anxiety. It's a form of B vitamin and totally safe. It might help as you prepare to leave. 650 mg. in the AM and PM is a starter dose.
That being said, I've found that actually thinking through the worst-case scenarios helps me. I won't go into gory details, but facing the fear (at night when I can't sleep and there's no one to talk to) makes me feel in control. But maybe I'm just weird.
And... I actually ENJOYED my root canal. I was 8 months pregnant with 5 littles at home - the anasthesia was perfect, didn't feel a thing, and I got to sit with my feet up for a few hours! LOL
I can relate! The first time I flew I was so excited but so scared! One person told me to chew gum when the plane was taking off and landing. That helped me with my ears and thinking about chewing helped me at those times.
Taking off was the hardest for me and I wanted to panic. However, I closed my eyes and then waited till we were in the air to open them. After a few times of flying I was ok and could keep them open, then I found that if I focus on something and instead of thinking how far up in the air I was I tried to watch how much smaller the things were getting and becoming amazed at it. This took time though!
I think my first few times flying I just tried to look out and figure out where I was, take guesses by mountains, large rivers etc. Anything to keep my mind off of the flying itself. I read, slept(well tried to) etc. and it all helped.
Instead of giving in to the fear and feeding it, distract by something you like. Find humor in the people on the plane. Believe me, there is humor there. Wonder what they are all flying for, see how they dress and take guesses. I got so that I let things distract me and have fun doing it.
Enjoy your trip!!
My husband and I recently flew on a tiny plane in Costa Rica and I was pretty freaked out...well and when we flew over the ocean to Europe. I just knew something was going to go wrong because we were having a ton of other things go wrong in life. When we arrived safely, I realized that God really is in control and loves us and wants the best for us. If you think about it, there are so FEW planes that have problems that when one runs into a hangar or whatever, it makes MAJOR headline news. So statistically...
The thing I do is find a book I'm really into and start it before I take off. Then I'm so into it the whole trip that it passes really quickly and I hardly even notice. If the plane bounces a little, I look up, see that no one else is freaking out and keep reading. I hope your trip goes well!
Next week I'm flying alone with two young children on TWO different international flights - one 6 hour and the next 8 hours, followed by a two-hour car journey to our destination. Did I mention I would be traveling without my husband?
There, if that doesn't make your flight sound less threatening, I don't know what will :).
*The chewing gum thing will help.
*Take along a good book or put a good book or two on your ipod/mp3 if you have one.
*Pack a couple pieces of fruit in your carry on bag. Most flights don't offer much if anything for snacks.
*Do you like puzzles? My hubby has some strategy puzzle magazines that he takes along and it gets his mind engaged on something other than what's going on around him. Sudoku or crosswords would works, too...
Enjoy your trip! I might be heading to NYC in 2 weeks and I can't wait. There's a great cajun place on Long Island that I was at 2 years ago and I can't wait to go back!!
I used to fly quite a lot when I was younger--including over the Atlantic to Europe! I thought nothing of it back then. Now, with a family to care about and all that 9/11 stuff--half a wonder a lot of us are worried.
I'm not going to tell you statistics and the laws of physics are all on your side. You know that already. What I'm going to tell you is what I do at the beginning of every flight, as we are taking off:
I say a prayer for the pilot and crew, and for a safe flight.
And then I:
put
the
whole
thing
out
of
my
head.
I read, do puzzles, listen to my MP3 player. I even look out the window and imagine how cool it would be to walk on the white, fluffy clouds.
I guess what I'm saying is...say a prayer and think of something else.
I'm sure you'll do fine. And have a great time in NYC! I went to college and worked there. Haven't been in years but I always enjoy when I go.
My comment is in case the whole distraction thing does not work for you. I actually fly pretty often, but it still really scares me. Mine is not a control issue as much, but I will not tell you what my issue is until after you fly. I do not need to create more fear :).
Anyway, the thing I do is a "faith confession". In my head, I just say over and over again the things I know to be true:
"God has my days numbered and today is NOT my day" (b/c I plan to be 100)
"There are thousands of flights everyday that make it safely"
"There are people who fly for a living. They do this everyday and are fine."
"The pilot has a family he wants to get home to, too. He will not take off if anything is wrong"
Things like that help me!
My tip is to splurge on yourself. Here's what I mean by that:
1. Get your iPod/Zune/Mp3 player and load it up with music you love. Buy a new CD on iTunes and save it for the plane. Put some worship music on, close your eyes, and keep focused on God during the "scarier" parts of the trip (takeoff and descent, any turbulence).
2. Go get a few of your favorite magazines or a new book from your favorite author that you know will keep you engrossed. Being a mom, you might have a whole list of stuff to read that you haven't had the chance to yet. (I recommend anything by Jodi Picoult or Francine Rivers).
3. Bring materials for anything creative that you do: laptop for blogging, journal for writing or sketching out art, scrapbook pages, etc.
Oh, and buy some gum. That way your ears popping won't distract you (because they will if you don't chew gum during the flight).
And keep in mind that one of the best tools of the devil is to keep us in bondage to fear. So if you start panicking or feel paralyzed with fear, call it for what it is (a tool of the enemy) and remind yourself how much fun you will have with your sis and you're not going to let him steal that joy from you.
Good luck! I hope - no, I know - you will have a wonderful time!
When I am stressed, I get out my ipod and listen to music, but mainly podcasts. Some good ones that I really learn a lot from are from "Focus on the Family" (family.org) I have a hard time reading on a plane or in a car, so the podcasts help me to "focus" on something else.
My vote is for the iPod. Some airlines actually pass out headphones and you can tune in to satellite radio. Finding the channel of your choice can be a nice distraction too.
i found you thru wfmw! it seems like we ALL have these issues w/ something in our life. my latest was a oral surgery that I HAD to have done. a bloggy friend suggested I fill my ipod/mp3 (whatever) with music and so i did. i'm not sure if the dentist could hear me trying to hum? but it made a profound difference in the procedure. well, that and valium.
but i feel your agony and this is my 2 cents. music that can refocus your attention and then you can sit there praisin' God and feeling hopefully more calm? best of luck!
I don't enjoy flying, either. On my most recent trip, during takeoff, I prayed. I put my head back, closed my eyes, took deep breaths, and talked to God.
I also chew gum because my ears pop easily.
I took a book, my mp3 player, and my laptop with me to keep me busy, and time "flew." Have a safe trip!
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